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Friday, February 13, 2009
The world curses my blessing
The world curses my blessing. What do I mean by that? Let me break it down to you I was given Cerebral Palsy due to unfortunate circumstances after my birth. Now the C.P. is isolated to only one part of my body, its my legs. If you were to ask me what do I think of my own disabillity I would tell you it sucks and that I wish I could be like everyone else. (That would be my response 10 years, but these days my heart is open and lord walk with me. Indeed yes if your a parent and you have a got a child with Cerebral Palsy it for sure is tramatizing and sometimes very fustating. During my birth , my dad saw the oxygen leave my body faster than a hot air balloon rises in the sky. It enragged my father to see myself as a baby fighting for air as my face was turning blue.
How did I loose oxygen well I left in the incubator too long after birth and I was left untended. My oxygen had been turned off , because in the words of the doctor who delivered me, I was the healthest baby he had ever seen especially for being seven weeks premature. So you can imagine how my father reacted , to see a perfectly healthy baby 5 minutes earlier and then what he describes as a horryifying sight that will be in the back of his mind for the rest of his life. He Demanded answers. All they could say is that they were extremely sorry we were short of staff and he was forgotten.
Moments after my parents had spoken to the doctors about my condition. They said unfornately he suffered extreme damage to the left side of his brain and will never walk or have an ordinary life.
My father a stubborn man at times, swore that day that those words will never come true. Many opitions for care were shut down to me, the only opition for myself and parents were to get therapy 3x's a week at Thames Valley Children Centre in London Ontario. I went to Thames Valley three times a week for 4 years. As you may have guessed it was a terrible inconvience on work for my parents, not to mention gas and road trips. Spending numerous times a week in the car having bakery pizza from Angelo's Italian bakery and grocery store. Because of this my father took it upon himself to do my exercises at home. He would stretch me out for days and hours at a time many times to the point that I would scream or cry as the young chils I was.
At school things were a bit different, I was often ridiculed and misunderstood for my differences physically. I always got asked by many small kids why do you walk like that. Why don't you walk like us, like normal people do?
I was kind of taken back by all the questions because I used to literaly have little kids on the play ground following me until I amswered their questions, day after day I would recieve the same question over and over again. To all those people who want the answer of what Anthony has become, and to all those people who want the real story and real answers behind it all once an for all here it is.
1. Is living with Cerebral Palsy difficult - Yes but not to the extend that you may think.
2. Is it painful- yes it is if my bones age more and more each day.
3. Can you get an operation to fix it? No
4. If there was would you want to have the surgery? No
5. What are the operations like? What do they do to you? Its just like the board game operation except using myself as the real person.
6. How can you walk so good now? years amd years of exercising and fittness.
7. How do manage to stay upbeat when people sometimes question you about your walking. - Easy there looking at it from the wrong angle of things.
8. How many operations have you had? - 14
9. Why so many? - because my form of C.P. is less common and the least harmful to ones body, the most common problem that my type of C.P. are just random bone shifts?
10. Are you made of steel? Yes and No there are numerous parts where I was opperated on that hold plenty of steel.
11. Does the steel hurt? - No you can't even feel it because its a combo of both repaired and restructed bone and steel.
12. Is it heireitary? No it is not at all, however the unfornate circumstances are that it is common. Which sadens me in a way because with everything we know today medically incidents like this happen daily. Thats right you heard me I said it happens DAILY!
So at the end of the day why would I say that C.P. has been a blessing mainly because of this, if you randomly look at me you can't tell that I have C.P. You can only tell when I start to walk that I have some sort of problems with my legs. Instead of looking at my challenging look at what I have that I can use. I do have legs that I often, it just takes me longer to get around. I have the abillity to carry an intelligent conversation. I look the same as any of you appearence wize. Cerebral Palsy for me has been one of the most fustrating things I have ever had to deal with, but it has also given me a change to not be like everyone else and that I would be at God's right hand , anytime.... In the movie the gospel of John. Jesus encounters a man who is paralyzed and has no use of his legs and hasn't for 38 years. This man was lying on a mat outside the jewish temple. Jesus asked the man, do you want to get well? He reponded in saying "Sir everytime I try to go into the water someone always gets there before me. I have no one to put me in the water when it is stired up just right. Jesus walked over to the man knelt down and said "Get up, pick up your mat and walk."
I am this way because he blessed me and those who curse my diagnosis of C.P. look at it the wrong way. "Stop looking for things I can't do and allow me to pick up and just keep walking so I can focus on the great things that I can do.
There's a particular verse in the bible that God reminded me of the other day while watching the Gospel of John.
I can't remember the verse right now but it goes a little something like this I believe so.
The man and women could not understand the message of Jesus, but the children could because their hearts are open.
In a sense God has taken me to my childhood and is having live out my destiny. As a child I would love to entertain. I would love to talk, I would love to make short funny movies. mainly about me starring me. I think thoughs are the best kinds of movies. He has taken the openness and expressive behaviour that I enjoyed as child and combined it with my love for music and thats why Radio is the perfect job for me to be.